Looking Back – 2020 on The Balancing Path was originally published to The Balancing Path column on Patheos Pagan, on December 28, 2020. It is presented here with some edits from the original.

I am sure I do not need to tell you that 2020 has been a year of massive and often unpredictable changes and upheaval for the world at large.  Those changes and my own personal journey have been reflected in the direction of my writings during this past year.

I started blogging for Patheos Pagan in October of 2019, as one of the contributors to The Agora.  In June of 2020, to my tremendous delight I was granted this solo column.  Between my contributions to The Agora and my posts to the solo column, including this one, I have created a total of 67 articles for Patheos in 2020.  I have tried to post at least one article a week, but despite that I continually felt like I was behind.  Honestly, I was rather shocked when I counted out the total.

There are two main metrics by which I measure the articles I have written – readership and personal importance.  There are quite a few articles which are special to me, for different reasons, and I would like to share those in particular with you.

13 Articles That Meant the Most to Me

It was tempting to rank these, because ranking is a Thing to Do when engaging in annual recaps, but I honestly cannot do it.  Instead, I am presenting these from oldest to most recent, and providing a few words about why I chose to include them here.  Some of them are among my most visited articles, while others are among the least visited.  If you have not read them yet, I hope you will take a look.

The Balancing Path: Nonbinary Perspective on Gendered Divinity

“Having a nonbinary perspective is for anyone, of any gender identity.  It is about framing your view of life, the universe, and everything, to include nonbinary ways of being.  Viewing reality from a binary perspective is akin to putting on blinders so you are hyperfocused on one small piece of reality (male and female), and making yourself blind to all the rest of the world around you, which will exist whether or not you acknowledge it.”

This article was special to me because it is an exploration of gendered divinity based in my personal experience and perspective on gender as a nonbinary, intergender person.  As someone who has always known they were neither male nor female, binary gender standards in spiritual exploration are particularly perplexing to me.  One of my goals in becoming a pagan blogger is to explore these issues for the benefit of both nonbinary people and binary gendered people who want to increase their understanding and inclusiveness of diverse experiences.

I expected to write a great deal more about nonbinary gender perspective during 2020.  It has factored into a few other articles to varying degrees, but frankly there have been other things which became much more pressing.  This is by far the most focused article on this theme this year.

The Balancing Path: Meeting Aradia

“Meeting Aradia was a profound experience, and one that I believe I will be unpacking now and again for the rest of my life.  I guess I had better get a copy of her Gospel and bother reading it, although that won’t change my experience, or my willingness to visit her again, especially when I feel lost and need guidance.  I know that most likely she will simply hold a mirror up to what I already know, but the ability to do so accurately and with compassion is a rare skill, and one that I will always cherish.”

I have visited Aradia frequently since having this experience.  I have also purchased a copy of Gospel of the Witches, but I still have not gotten past the first page.  Sometime soon, hopefully, even though there are a few other books in my stack I am far more interested in reading.  Sometimes what we need to read is not the most interesting thing available.

The Balancing Path: Stress and Anxiety Management Sigil

“This is a sigil to help support efforts at managing prolonged stress and anxiety.  I created it specifically to help cope with the stresses of the COVID-19 quarantine situation, but it is potentially applicable to any time when you are experiencing prolonged stress and anxiety due to external situations.”

Of all the sigils I have posted, this is the one I used the most often.  In fact, more often than not I have it drawn on my left forearm.  It has been very helpful to me for mitigating the negative effects of stress caused not only by COVID and ongoing political dumpster fires, but also by shadow work I have been doing this year.

The Balancing Path: Scientifically Minded Witchcraft

“Practicing scientifically minded witchcraft means acknowledging the validity and veracity of both the scientific process and liminal magical practices.  Despite the superficial contradictions involved in that statement, science and magic are not at all mutually exclusive, and no, I don’t need to appeal to quantum theory to make that assertion.”

The principles I outline in this article are core to how I view the world both on physical and metaphysical levels.  Both science and magic are beautiful and real things, which we should all be paying attention to.  They are simply two different tools for exploring ourselves and the world around us, with vastly different strengths and weaknesses.

The Balancing Path: Interconnected Elements (Fire, Water, Earth, & Air)

“In my experience, the elements are worlds away from the isolated energetic bastions of oppositional power which they are often portrayed as.  On the contrary, I have found that each element, no matter how “pure” the conjuring or elemental, contains a seed of every other element.  Rather than being isolated and oppositional, the elements are interdependent and interconnected in a balanced matrix, incapable of existing without each other.”

This article explains some of the foundational metaphysics for the ritual system I use in my personal practice.  It is a topic I intend to explore in greater depth in the future.

Tarot Thoughts: Hanged Man Vibes for Tower Times

“If you find yourself thrown off your foundation and hanging by your foot, instead of immediately struggling to get down, relax and take the time to see what that new point of view can reveal to you.  It might just help you figure out how to land on a path that will lead to a future you truly want.”

This has been a theme for me since COVID started, and it applies to all the tumultuous changes which have occurred and are continuing to occur in relation to Tower Times.  It is critical to take the time to breathe and reorient with each upheaval, so you can find your best possible way forward.

Shadow Work and the Magic of Critical Introspection

“At first glance, “shadow work” can sound like an edgelord, revel in selfishness and baneful magic kind of thing.  In reality, it is an important part of modern psychology and key to achieving mental health and emotional wellbeing.”

In this article I outline my personal approach to doing shadow work, critical introspection.  If it were not for these techniques, I would literally not be the person I am today.  I hope these techniques will be helpful for you as well.  This is one of my most viewed articles for this year, and it is the one I have linked to the most from articles I have written in the months since.

Ethical Baneful Magic for all Skill and Experience Levels

“In order to ethically engage in baneful magic, you need to have a clear understanding of your moral compass, and the why, what, and how of your spellwork.”

This was the first of four articles I posted this past fall about baneful and blessing magic.  I wanted to contribute to the general conversation going on around baneful magic and its uses for social justice.  I see baneful magic as nothing more than a very powerful tool, which, when used ethically and thoughtfully, can be profoundly beneficial.  I also do not see it as something that is “only for advanced witches”.  It is far more important to approach baneful magic thoughtfully and deliberately, with a strong ethical foundation, than to wait until you have been practicing for some arbitrary amount of time.

An Introduction to the Craft of Blessing Magic

“…blessing magic, as a topic unto itself, is often approached in a cringeworthy manner, especially in casual discussion.  When blessings are emphasized as a practice, it has a depressing tendency to turn into a parade of toxic positivity, path shaming, ego stroking, and self-delusion.  This results in a lot of people who write about magic skirting the topic of blessings, mentioning it only superficially (everyone understands what is meant by blessings, right?), or taking steps to distance the writing from those cringeworthy problems (like I am doing right here).  This is truly a shame, because understanding and learning how to effectively use the versatility of blessing magic is, well, a blessing!”

Blessing magic is just as effective as baneful magic when seeking to create change.  They are simply different approaches to solving the same problems.  The two related articles which I am not individually highlighting here are on using baneful and blessing magic simultaneously, and a collection of minor hexes and blessings.

Beyond Magical Names – Many Names for Many Reasons

“From craft names to deadnames, nicknames to married names, usernames to aliases, there are innumerable reasons that most people have multiple names they currently use or have previously used to identify themselves.  Despite what bureaucratic systems would have us believe, names, even magical names, are mutable and can change over time as our circumstances change and we, ourselves, change.  Most of those names have deeper meaning than the specific letters spelled out on our birth certificates or driver’s licenses.”

As someone who has legally changed their name, I have spent a great deal of time thinking about the nature of names, the number of names most of us have, and our reasons for having or changing them.  Choosing your own name can be a powerful affirmation of self.  It also greatly delighted me to be able to use tattoos as a metaphor for choosing a new name.

Is It Fate, Cause and Effect, Coincidence, or Self-Determination?

“We have all heard declarations ranging from “Everything happens for a reason,” to “Nothing happens for any reason.”  It is so easy to get caught up in absolutes and polarized binaries that it is easy to drown in the waters of all or nothing, even though the reality of life is never that neat and clean.  Nothing has only one answer or one cause, and how the events of our lives shape us and the rest of reality is a complicated mess of interrelations, cause and effect, random chance, personal choices, and metaphysical impetus.  Sure, some things may boil down to a form of fate or destiny, or Fate or Destiny, but in either case most things are very explainable through abject mundanity.”

If I had to pick one overarching theme to my writing, it is that binary systems and absolutist thinking are limiting and often erroneous.  Even when talking about issues of Fate, it is important to look beyond binary assumptions to understand the nuances that genuinely determine the course of events.

Finding Confidence and Direction as a Pagan Blogger

“When I started blogging about paganism and witchcraft, I expected the hardest part to be deciding what to write about.  I did not expect the hardest part to be having confidence in the public relevance of what I was writing.  Since 2006 I have blogged, presented, and taught on other topics (mostly sewing, reenactment, cosplay, and art), and I never doubted the relevance of what I was offering in those areas.  Yet after I started writing about magic and spirituality, I found myself at times nearly drowning in doubt.  I am resolved to keep at this, but it has been frustratingly difficult to alleviate my anxiety and ease the stresses it creates.  At last, I finally have a plan to tackle it, and the first step is sharing that plan with you.”

This article goes into detail on a tarot reading I did that helped me realize where my lack of confidence was coming from.  Since writing this, I have found that in my tarot readings the King of Swords usually represents overthinking.  I overthink my writing a lot, but I do not want to entirely let go of critically reviewing my articles, so it will take time to find a good balance.

Lament for the Lost

“This rather lengthy poem was created to commemorate all that has been lost, especially in recent months and recent years, from lives, to livelihoods, normalcy, dignity, and sanity.  The very first week that the United States locked down due to COVID-19, I felt that I would need to write this.  To my surprise, it was not a week or two later, but instead many months before I was able to compose this poem.  It is not just about recognizing losses, but also having compassion for others and ourselves, no matter the individual struggle.  I hope it speaks to you, helps to give your heart voice, and helps to sooth the wounds of so many overwhelming losses of so many kinds, near and far.”

This is one of my least-viewed articles, but it is one that has a tremendous amount of meaning for me.

My 5 Most-Viewed 2020 Posts on The Balancing Path

This is based just on the posts since June 17, 2020, since I have easy access to the analytics on the solo column articles.

1. Easy Alternatives to White Sage for Smoke Cleansing
2. Shadow Work and the Magic of Critical Introspection
3. The Magic of Unfriending, Blocking, and Banning on Social Media
4. A Collection of Minor Hexes and Blessings
5. Menstrual Magic for Uterus-Owners of All Genders

My 5 Most Interacted With 2020 Posts on The Agora

These five notable posts are ranked based roughly on how much interaction they received through social media.  If you have not read them yet, I hope you will take the time.

1. The Balancing Path: Spells for Black Lives Matter
2. The Balancing Path: Nonbinary Perspective on Gendered Divinity
3. The Balancing Path: Can Pets Be Familiars …. Or are They Fellow Witches?
4. The Balancing Path: My Nonbinary Liminal Pantheacon Experience
5. The Balancing Path: Stress and Anxiety Management Sigil

Looking Ahead to 2021

Tower Times are nowhere near over, but I feel that we have turned a corner in many ways.  Here in the United States, we will have a new president at the end of January.  There are now two viable vaccines for COVID-19.  There is greater awareness of the inequities and injustices which are ingrained in the American legal system.  These things give me hope, but there is still a ton of work to do, and a lot of rough times still ahead.

Depending upon how other things shake out with Congress, the new president may find himself blockaded from accomplishing genuine change.  The vaccines are available, but it will take a great deal of time to distribute them to everyone who is willing to take them.  I also worry that there are too many anti-vaxxers to accomplish genuine herd immunity in the USA, or we would not have been experiencing measles outbreaks in 2019.  Awareness of inequities and injustices is only the first step in a very, very long and difficult road to create equality and justice for all.  Plus, the white supremacist systems which empowered Trump still exist, and must be dismantled lest we later have a repeat of the last four years.

There are many ways I want to expand what I am sharing with you and how I interact with the greater pagan, polytheist, and witchcraft communities.  This includes teaching, participating in online events, posting videos, and doing art, but I have no idea how much of that my physical limitations will allow.  I am going to try to publish a memoir I have been working on since August of 2019, and I expect to start writing another book more specific to a witchy audience.

I am sure I will continue to post on a mixture of social justice issues, current events, and magical principles, with a heavy emphasis on dismantling binary perspectives, seeking balance, explorations of self, and contemplations about metaphysics and the nature of existence.

I have no idea where exactly any of that will lead, because nothing is certain, especially right now.  Even though I do not know how life will shake out in 2021, I do look forward to it and all the possibilities it brings.

May you stay safe, happy and in good health, with all your needs met, and keep fighting the good fight in whatever way is your jam.