Way back in 2001 I had a dream where I saw an image of Ganesh tattooed on my left upper arm, but it was a version of him I had never seen before. At the time I was very thin (underweight, actually), but in the dream when I was looking at my arm I noted that it was thicker, like it is now when I am about 50 lbs over my ideal weight. I looked around my chest and body and saw other tattoos, but they were less specific, like it was more the idea that I would be covered in tattoos that was more important than specifically what those tattoos were. I saw a lot of knotwork, but no detail to it. Looking at those indistinct tattoos, though, I saw that my body was svelte, and I knew that those tattoos would come later, after I had returned to an ideal weight. At this stage of my life I know that means they will come after I have found health again. Ganesh clearly needed to come first, and I can’t help but feel that is very important, and very appropriate.

The image on my arm burned clearly into my consciousness even after waking, and I knew it would remain that way until I had found reference material that would help me flesh out the details. Even at my current weight, the circumference of my arm is not very much, and that’s a lot of detail to pack in, so I couldn’t clearly make out or remember exactly what he was holding in his hands. It took me many years to find something even close. To date I have found photos of a total of 3 statues of Ganesh labeled as being in the pose of Nataraja, dancing, with sixteen arms and a ring of fire. I have found nothing on that pose in other mediums, except for brief text descriptions from informal sources listing items held. Those images and the direction they turned my research gave me the information I needed to determine exactly what might be appropriate for him to hold in each of those sixteen hands, and now I am finally working on bringing to life the image I saw in that dream.

This is a very personal image, so I did make some alterations from Ganesh’s typical iconography. I replaced the veena with a paintbrush since I am a painter but not a musician, and the spirit of the item is to convey artistic creativity. I also gave him a vjara due to my Buddhist leanings, and selected other items that felt appropriate from the wide assortment he is known to hold across various poses. The other details I am trying to keep true to the dream, so he is dancing upon a lotus pedestal, and the flames have a leaf shape to them instead of being in a circle. I don’t remember noticing Ganesh’s mouse in the dream, and I’m honestly a bit torn about whether or not to include him based on the symbolism, so for now he is accompanying at the base of the lotus.

I’m not an expert in Hinduism and would never claim to be. I’m an animistic polytheist witch with Buddhist leanings who had a dream featuring Ganesh, and I’m trying to bring that image into reality. One of my hopes has been to find a descriptor that is appropriate, and the meaning of Nataraja fit and felt right, so it’s what I’m using right now. I have no idea if Ganesh in the post of Nataraja (normally associated with his father, Shiva) is actually a new idea, or an old and rare one, because I’ve had such a hard time finding any information about any pose that remotely matches up to the dream. Maybe there’s a better descriptor I haven’t found yet. All I can say for certain is that none of the traditional 32 Hindu poses worked for the meaning I want, or matched up to what I saw in the dream. I also took inspiration from several Buddhist versions of Ganesh (mostly Tibetan, but also Japanese), but none of them fit on their own either. I ended up settling on Nataraja because of the meaning of the pose, and how beautifully and powerfully it melds with the aspect of Ganesh as a breaker of barriers and guide in times of change. I needed to evoke aspects of his creative side and his warrior side, breaking down what is unneeded and bringing forth all the tools to create and move forward, in constant motion, with joy and fury, compassion and glory, and the wisdom to know when to yield and when to fight.

From here I am going to ink a linework version on a clean piece of paper so if I am less than thrilled with the result I haven’t destroyed my sketch. I’ll scan and enlarge that, transfer it onto a painting surface, and make a final painting. When I can afford it, my plan is to send the linework and image of the painting to Misha so she can simplify and shrink it, and then tattoo it on my left upper arm. As is, the drawing is way too detailed to work in such a small space as a tattoo, and the image I saw in the dream was much simpler as well.

After so many years of contemplation, I am incredibly excited to finally see this piece coming into being.

Project: Ganesh