The Balancing Path: Calling the Fates to Hex was originally published to The Agora column on Patheos Pagan, on November 11, 2019. It is presented here with some edits from the original.

I have seen a lot of debate about how ethical hexing may or may not be.  There is no shortage of witches who refuse to hex because they feel it is deliberately harmful, and therefore automatically unethical.

I am not one of those witches.

It would be quite a feat for me to never hex if I were inclined to attempt such a path.  Witchcraft and magic are an integral part of how I move through life, so when things happen and I feel someone is being an ass, the hexes also just happen, whether it is someone being rude, someone proudly displaying racist symbols, an acquaintance being petty or mean, or something else entirely.

For me, the question of ethics comes in with whether or not the recipient truly deserves a hex, not whether or not hexes should be cast. If someone is displaying racist symbols, it’s an easy conclusion for me, because hating other people just for existing leads people to do some pretty awful things that deserve some recompense.  But what if I get cut off in traffic and almost get into an accident?  Sure, some people are just rude drivers and do so with disturbing regularity, but even the best drivers will occasionally make mistakes.  Some random stranger I run into who is being rude and abrasive might be a rude person all the time, but they also might just be having a bad day, or be dealing with something else I have no way of knowing about (and which is frankly none of my business anyway).  I know I am sometimes very rude when I’m having a particularly high pain day (yay, chronic illness), and I don’t mean it.

If someone is not normally a rude person, but they are just having a particularly bad day or hard spot in their life, adding on a hex with the intent of deliberate harm is not going to help a damned thing.  In fact, it’s likely to make it worse.  Yet, I can’t help but throw hexes, so what’s a witch to do?

My solution is to call The Fates to notice the person, and give them, in this life, whatever lesson they deserve for their deeds.  I certainly don’t know what a stranger truly deserves, but They do.  They know every thread of every life, and They have the ability to weave it differently if They deem it appropriate.

So, that racist may just need a firm kick in the rear to help them realize how awful they are being, or they may have done many vile deeds with no remorse that deserve serious retribution.  That rude person might need some lessons on civility, or they might need some good luck to help them out through a difficult time.  The Fates know which, and can deliver the best solution for the circumstances, be that a curse or a blessing.  If The Fates decide to pay closer attention to that person’s thread beyond that, that is Their prerogative.

I have a very long-standing respect for The Fates, in whatever forms They take.  I have absolutely no doubt that They have had a very deliberate hand in my life, and while that is rarely easy, I wouldn’t trade it for anything.  I like having an interesting life, I welcome change, and I’m not afraid to look at myself critically, flaws and all.

Since They are already present in my life, and I’m not afraid of whatever They might bring, I also have no fear about calling Their attention.  If calling for the attention of The Fates makes you nervous, you can also call upon other deities or spirits who are interested in judgement or retribution.  The point is, if you don’t know what kind of retribution a person deserves, it might be better to leave the details to another being who does know.

If, on the other hand, you do know the details and understand the person and their deeds, hex and curse away with all the detail you care to muster.  I’m a firm believer in self defense and justice.  There is no shortage of bad deeds that go completely unpunished in this world, and if you feel called to put energy into righting some of that, more power to you.